My favourite book

My favourite book of all time (so far) is The House at Pooh Corner by A. A. Milne. I have had the book since 1970, I was 7 at the time. My favourite character from the book changes depending on how I am feeling. I find that I am like many of the characters and all of them.

WinnieSometimes I am Pooh; muddleheaded, philosopher, naive, a great capacity to accept others regardless of their failings, and knows he has some very great friends who love him and support him.

“For I am a Bear of Very Little Brain, and long words Bother me.”

“Oh bear!” said Christopher Robin. “How I do love you!””So do I,” said Pooh.

“Tigger is all right, really,” said Pooh lazily.
“Of course he is,” said Christopher Robin.
“Everybody is really,” said Pooh. “That’s what I think,” said Pooh. “But I don’t suppose I’m right,” he said.
“Of course you are,” said Christopher Robin.

PigletSometimes I am Piglet; small, scared, afraid of a lot of the world and yet also knows he has great friends, one in particular.

Promise me you’ll always remember: You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.

“What?” said Piglet, with a jump. And then, to show that he hadn’t been frightened, he jumped up and down once or twice more in an exercising sort of way.

“I think,” said Piglet, when he had licked the tip of his nose too, and found that it brought very little comfort, “I think that I have just remembered something. I have just remembered something that I forgot to do yesterday and shan’t be able to do tomorrow. So I suppose I really ought to go back and do it now.”

eeyoreSometimes I am Eeyore; depressed with everything, down, can’t see anything good, doesn’t want to participate and is sometimes surprised when others want to help him.

“Good morning, Pooh Bear,” said Eeyore gloomily. “If it is a good morning,” he said. “Which I doubt,” said he.
“Why, what’s the matter?”
“Nothing, Pooh Bear, nothing. We can’t all, and some of us don’t. That’s all there is to it.”
“Can’t all what?” said Pooh, rubbing his nose.
“Gaiety. Song-and-dance. Here we go round the mulberry bush.”

I thought,” said Piglet earnestly, “that if Eeyore stood at the bottom of the tree, and if Pooh stood on Eeyore’s back, and if I stood on Pooh’s shoulders -”
“And if Eeyore’s back snapped suddenly, then we could all laugh. Ha Ha! Amusing in a quiet way,” said Eeyore, “but not really helpful.”

It’s your fault, Eeyore. You’ve never been to see any of us. You just stay here in this one corner of the Forest waiting for the others to come to you. Why don’t you go to THEM sometimes?

A complex man,

Eccles

WinniePigletEeyore

A new experience

o-bondage-facebookI promised on twitter that I would write about a recent experience that was totally new for me. Well it’s taken a couple of weeks but I here I go.

If you have read previous posts you will know that I am now 1 year into a time of change for me. I have turned from the christian faith and have met some fabulous women that are introducing me to a world of sensuality I didn’t know existed. Or if I acknowledged that this world existed christianity told me it was bad. (I am deliberately using lower case when talking about christianity.) Last year was a year of huge change for me, this year I am still changing but this year I am focussing on what I think is a rebellion in me to the 30+ years of christianity.

This year I am investigating the world of sensual bondage. And a couple of weeks ago I received a pleasant introduction to that world. Let me explain why I am delving into this world.

I have pondered my life, both past and present, over the last year. I have written about different forms of oppression I have felt in my life; family, church, marriage, illness… I am trying to relieve myself of some of these. Last year I got rid of the church/religion oppression in my life. There is still a bit of conflict inside me, but I know where I am now and where I am going. Some illness I cannot do anything about, my Type 1 Diabetes for example. However, I always felt that having to wear a bracelet or necklace was being forced upon me (seems trivial I know). But I got rid of that and I now have a tattoo on my forearm which serves the same purpose as the medical bracelet. I love my tattoo.

Marriage however, that’s another story. My wife and I are in to our 30th year of marriage. Some would applaud that, some not. I do and do not applaud it. Yes there are times when being married has been the greatest experience. There are more times when it has not. In my marriage I have lost myself. I am now at a stage that I do not do anything without thinking how my wife will react. It is very oppressive and mind numbingly exhausting.

What does this have to do with bondage? I am going to be so open with you here and this may change the way some think of me. The bondage gives me a way to be oppressed and still know I will experience great sex. If that sounds freaky or crazy, so be it (yes I do see a psychologist).

So I have had my first (very light) bondage session with a wonderful sex worker who took it nice and easy on me. I, not knowing what was going to happen, was not able to properly explain to her what I was looking for. So, even though I had a fabulous time there were things that I would not be doing again. We ventured off into a bit of humiliation; that was not for me. I think because of my lack of communication up front we were having more of a submission session than a bondage session. But now I know.

Things I have learnt:

  • It would be better to do this with someone you know and are comfortable with. I made the mistake of meeting with a lady I had never met before and so neither of us knew how the other would react to certain things and I do believe we were both very nervous.
  • Do some research and have an idea of what you are looking for. This will help both yourself and the sex worker prepare for the session.
  • Make sure you know the difference between bondage, submission and dominance. They are very different things.

I think this is getting long enough. I thoroughly enjoyed my time with this lady and we had a great chat afterwards about the session and how we felt. I do believe I am going to enjoy this new part of my secret life.

A bound man,

Eccles

Here I am

Morning coffeeIt has been a while since I have published a post. Why so long? I am okay, in fact I am doing really well and have been for a while now. Yes I have down days but on the whole I have been enjoying life. So why haven’t I published a post? I have sat down many times and started but found myself staring at the keyboard and couldn’t get any inspiration to finish a post. Now that the warmer weather is here I am down at my favourite cafe writing again.

So what’s been happening? I’m back at work full time and loving it. The work is just the right amount and the hours at the moment are normal. I wake up and enjoy going to work as I know I will be challenged, but I know I will also be able to solve the problems presented to me. I am starting to get to the gym (semi) regularly. I booked a session with a personal trainer and he has drawn up a plan for me that I am able to follow on my own. That is happening 3 times a week at the moment. And by the way, I hate squats. Have been to see my endocrinologist and everything is going well with my diabetes. Apparently I should be having eye problems by now having been a diabetic for 39 years but my eyes are still fine (yay).

My psychologist and I are trying something a bit different with me at the moment. We are concentrating on my social phobia at the moment (only because I haven’t told her about my secret life).This is what I struggle with the most on a daily basis. So, w are trying a plan to get me out on my own, without family or friends to hide behind. It has been very rare in my life that I have been on my own in social situations. I started this experiment by venturing into the Canberra night life one night.went to a club that is also a whisky bar. it is amazing how little I actually know about whisky. Anyway after a few hours I found myself in Fyshwick at a new establishment there called Red Door Canberra. This massage parlour is a fabulous place to find relaxation and to unwind. I have been twice now and the ladies have made me feel welcome and totally relaxed.

I am planning my next solo adventure. Another trip to Melbourne. I am planning to stay for 3 nights this time starting Sun 8 Nov. If I fly up early enough I might spend the day at Sexpo (Sunday is the last day). (Oh look, I’ve turned into an advertising site.) Anyone in Melbourne want to join me for the day? I am also hoping to catch up with friends while I am there, some I have met before, some I haven’t. I do so hope the planning comes off and I can get to Melbourne. I am doing some adjusting of finances to see if I can pull this off.

Well look at that; 500+ words. I think that is all for this post, will post again soon. I am excited for the next two weeks (hehe, and that will stay just as it is) and am excited hoping I can manage to get to Melbourne.

An excited man,

Eccles

Be happy

Melbourne excursion

I think I could live in Melbourne. I grew up in country NSW in a smallish town, the son of one of the town doctors. Hated it. Went to a boarding school in Sydney when I was 15. Changed my life forever. Living in the city was exciting, everything I wanted.

Currently I live in Canberra and have done so since 1992. Don’t get me wrong, Canberra was the right place for us to start and bring up a family. I have great friends, a good job and and it is where my private life started and blossomed. But it is not a Sydney or Melbourne.

In a previous post you will know that I decided to go to Melbourne to see a gorgeous lady. This is about that trip.

6:15 I fly out of chilly Canberra. I love travelling but don’t get to do it often enough. 7:25 arrive at Melbourne airport. 90 minutes later (I had forgotten what city traffic can be like) I arrive at the Park Hyatt in Melbourne. I felt like some indulgence. I leave my bag there and venture off to the city for a day of discovery and preparation.

First stop breakfast. My doctor had recommended a place called Cumulus Inc on Flinders Lane. Magic. I decided on the bircher muesli, I just couldn’t bring myself to have the English breakfast (blood sausage/black pudding). The coffee was excellent. I can recommend this place, for breakfast at least.

After breakfast I wandered the city to try and get the lay of the land. I also had to buy some stuff for the evening/nights rendezvous. Being of the person I am I tried to plan out the best way to travel the city and pick up the items I wanted. So what did I need

  • A particular vintage French champagne
  • Dark champagne truffles from Haigh’s Chocolates
  • Some fruit to go with the above items
  • A new pair of pants
  • A new pair of shoes

I found myself outside David Jones on the Bourke Street Mall. In I go to find some clothes. Up to menswear and to the Gazman collection. I like Gazman, they not only look good, wear well but do a size that fits me well (yes, I am a bit overweight). Pants, check. Looked at the shoes, couldn’t find anything I really liked. So down to the food hall and check out the liquor department. Couldn’t find the champagne I was looking for so opted for another one I had tried before and really enjoyed (picture later). Champagne, check. Added bonus, the food hall also sells Wensleydale cheese. Love my Wensleydale and yes I am a Wallace and Gromit fan. I will be back later to get some of that.

A friend had suggested I go to Queen Victoria Markets to get the fruit. Okay, time to figure out the trams. Lo and behold, trams are free in Melbourne CBD; best idea ever. So tram down to Elizabeth Street and then another up to the markets. Man, nothing like this in Canberra. I wandered around for a good hour and a half. Found the fruit I was looking for, check.

Lunch time, what to have. Out goes the twitter call and back come the answers. Off I go trying to find the N Lee bakery and get a Grilled Pork Vietnamese roll. Absolutely delicious. Do get one if you’re in Melbourne. Mine didn’t have the chilly but I believe they are just as nice with the chill.

Now, where is Haigh’s Chocolates. Oh look just around the corner, yay my feet were getting sore. Pick up the champagne truffles and then back to the hotel for a rest and to prepare for tonight.

No details about the evening other than it was great to catch up with my lady friend. We talked, drank, ate chocolate, and…

After my companion left I couldn’t sleep; I was happy, satisfied, content, I was enjoying myself. I read and eventually went to sleep and dreamt of my lover and times yet to come.

I woke at 8 the next morning eager to get this new day started. I wandered down to The Commune for breakfast. No muesli today, bacon, eggs, sausage and rosti. And another great coffee.

Back to the hotel, pack and check out. I had a ticket booked for the David Bowie exhibition for 11am. Left my bag at the hotel and wandered into the city to find another coffee. It started drizzling. Damn, my umbrella is in my bag back at the hotel.

I am listening to Heroes right now while writing this and remembering yesterday. I have tears on my cheeks at the moment.

I found a nice “alley” full of coffee shops. Picked one and sat under an umbrella in the rain, had a coffee and started journaling. Some of you will know that is one of my favourite activities and I do it several times a week. Out of the journaling comes these blog posts.

Down to Federation Square to see the exhibition; half hour early but they let me in anyway. Absolutely fabulous exhibition; one of the best I have ever seen. It covered his whole life. All his outfits were on display. I got to learn more about him as an artist. His music and videos were everywhere. As they give you your ticket they say it will take one to one and a half hours to go through the exhibition. Ha, more than two and half hours later I emerge – an emotional wreck (see previous post). Watching everybody and they reacted to the exhibition was great; us older people were dancing along with the music while reading and absorbing. Enough said other than if you can make it to Melbourne before 1 November then do.

Because of the way I was feeling I decided I had better get to the airport and wait out there for my plane. I spent a couple of hours at the airport, had a couple of drinks and started my blog posts. Not the way I planned to end my trip to Melbourne.

Overall the trip to Melbourne was a great break and I enjoyed it very much. Melbourne, I will be back.

Still recovering,

Eccles