A new experience

o-bondage-facebookI promised on twitter that I would write about a recent experience that was totally new for me. Well it’s taken a couple of weeks but I here I go.

If you have read previous posts you will know that I am now 1 year into a time of change for me. I have turned from the christian faith and have met some fabulous women that are introducing me to a world of sensuality I didn’t know existed. Or if I acknowledged that this world existed christianity told me it was bad. (I am deliberately using lower case when talking about christianity.) Last year was a year of huge change for me, this year I am still changing but this year I am focussing on what I think is a rebellion in me to the 30+ years of christianity.

This year I am investigating the world of sensual bondage. And a couple of weeks ago I received a pleasant introduction to that world. Let me explain why I am delving into this world.

I have pondered my life, both past and present, over the last year. I have written about different forms of oppression I have felt in my life; family, church, marriage, illness… I am trying to relieve myself of some of these. Last year I got rid of the church/religion oppression in my life. There is still a bit of conflict inside me, but I know where I am now and where I am going. Some illness I cannot do anything about, my Type 1 Diabetes for example. However, I always felt that having to wear a bracelet or necklace was being forced upon me (seems trivial I know). But I got rid of that and I now have a tattoo on my forearm which serves the same purpose as the medical bracelet. I love my tattoo.

Marriage however, that’s another story. My wife and I are in to our 30th year of marriage. Some would applaud that, some not. I do and do not applaud it. Yes there are times when being married has been the greatest experience. There are more times when it has not. In my marriage I have lost myself. I am now at a stage that I do not do anything without thinking how my wife will react. It is very oppressive and mind numbingly exhausting.

What does this have to do with bondage? I am going to be so open with you here and this may change the way some think of me. The bondage gives me a way to be oppressed and still know I will experience great sex. If that sounds freaky or crazy, so be it (yes I do see a psychologist).

So I have had my first (very light) bondage session with a wonderful sex worker who took it nice and easy on me. I, not knowing what was going to happen, was not able to properly explain to her what I was looking for. So, even though I had a fabulous time there were things that I would not be doing again. We ventured off into a bit of humiliation; that was not for me. I think because of my lack of communication up front we were having more of a submission session than a bondage session. But now I know.

Things I have learnt:

  • It would be better to do this with someone you know and are comfortable with. I made the mistake of meeting with a lady I had never met before and so neither of us knew how the other would react to certain things and I do believe we were both very nervous.
  • Do some research and have an idea of what you are looking for. This will help both yourself and the sex worker prepare for the session.
  • Make sure you know the difference between bondage, submission and dominance. They are very different things.

I think this is getting long enough. I thoroughly enjoyed my time with this lady and we had a great chat afterwards about the session and how we felt. I do believe I am going to enjoy this new part of my secret life.

A bound man,

Eccles